February 2026 OC Virtual Death Cafe
2026-02-03 16:30 - 18:00 (America/Los_Angeles) | Orange County Virtual Death Cafe, United States
The O.C. Virtual Death Cafe is the place to be to immerse yourself in a lively discussion around dying and death. Anyone who is curious about dying and death is welcome.
Are you looking for a safe place to share your thoughts, ask questions, and hear what others say? At our long-running O.C. Virtual Death Cafe, we welcome all opinions and topics, provided the guidelines that keep the discussions safe and accessible are respected. Please RSVP to: melissa@lastactsoflove.com for the Zoom link or more information.
The History of the OC Virtual Death Cafe
Southern California resident and end-of-life doula Linda Barnard co-hosted the first Orange County Death Cafe in October 2021 with veteran San Diego Death Cafe host, Dr. Mitsuo “Mits” Tomita. What started as a mid-COVID monthly meetup has continued to flourish as a virtual monthly discussion. Linda continued to host the Orange County Death Cafe after Mits was unavailable to co-host monthly. Linda decided to step down as host in September 2024.
In October 2024, Linda asked San Diego Virtual Death Cafe host Melissa ‘Mel’ McClave to take over hosting duties of the Orange County Death Cafe. Mel made the Orange County Death Cafe a permanent virtual meeting and changed the name to OC Virtual Death Cafe.
Deathwork in Orange County, California
For over 100 years, the residents of Orange County, California, have thoughtfully cared for their dead. Orange County is home to about one million residents, all of whom will die. The ethnic diversity of the county requires a thoughtful approach to cultural rituals and modern legacy options.
Leisure World in Seal Beach and Laguna Hills are Orange County’s premier retirement communities. Residents of Leisure World buy into their community knowing that it will be their home at the end of life. Residents are serviced by nearby mortuaries and cemeteries.
In May 2024, Barbara McMurray founded the Orange County Deathworkers Alliance to bring together traditional and new-age practitioners of end-of-life care providers. The alliance currently includes caregiver services, end-of-life doulas, physicians, memorial artists, and authors who write extensively on end of life topics.

Virtual Terminal Talk
2026-02-11 10:30 - 12:00, 2026-04-08 11:30 - 13:00, 2026-04-20 11:30 - 13:00 | Virtual Terminal Talk, CA, 92024, United States
Do you have a life-limiting diagnosis? Virtual Terminal Talk is a FREE group-led discussion inviting people living with a life-limiting diagnosis to join others in exploring the realities of dying and death. This supportive space encourages participants to share thoughts on the physical, emotional, and spiritual aspects of dying. While grief may naturally emerge, Terminal Talk does not serve as a grief support group or cater to caregivers, loved ones, or the general public.
All diagnoses are welcome! Whether you’re living with ALS, cancer, heart failure, or something else, we want you to join our group. We are a friendly place and understand the loneliness that comes with trying to make sense of our fate.
The History of Terminal Talk
Terminal Talk’s host, Mel McClave, was invited by Roseana Spangler-Sims to host “Terminal Talk: An Open Discussion on Dying for a Select Few.” Roseana yearned for a place where people living with an incurable diagnosis could come together to talk about their experience. In May 2025, Mel hosted the first “Terminal Talk” in person at the Vista Senior Center.
Although people wanted a virtual option, Terminal Talk remained in-person until Roseana’s death in August 2025. Consequently, Mel pivoted the in-person meeting into a virtual meeting on the same date and time. Mel learned how to host a group like Terminal Talk through her volunteer work as a Death Cafe host.
The Future
Seven people joined the first meeting of the Virtual Terminal Talk. Considering the nature of this discussion group, it’s important to invite all who qualify to participate. The bond we form transcends the limits of geography and time.
In 2026, we expanded Terminal Talk to two meetings per month. We are blessed to spend 90 minutes together twice a month.
We need your support to help Terminal Talk continue to grow. Please share this free resource with anyone who qualifies or knows someone who qualifies. This is important as the founding members of the group succumb to their fate and are only present in spirit.
Join “Terminal Talk” – a free, confidential group for those living with a life-limiting diagnosis to openly discuss the physical, emotional, and spiritual aspects of dying.

Exclusively for patients – not caregivers, loved ones, or the general public.

"What Is A Death Doula?" Lecture and Discussion
2026-02-18 10:00 - 11:30 | San Diego Oasis Rancho Bernardo, 17170 Bernardo Center Dr, San Diego, 92128, United States
Join me, Melissa McClave, on Wednesday, February 18, at the San Diego Oasis Rancho Bernardo campus for an educational lecture and discussion, “What Is A Death Doula?” about what Death Doulas are and how they fit into the modern end-of-life care. This 90-minute class delves into the history of end-of-life doula support, how dying and death practices have shifted in the U.S.A. since the 19th century, and what our role is in today’s death care.
The format of the lecture is a slide show that begins with defining the role of a death doula. Next, I will briefly cover the history of doula support in caring for the dying and the rituals surrounding burials and mourning. Following this, I will briefly cover the changes in death care since the Civil War and the advent of modern medicine. Next, I will discuss what your current end-of-life options are and how to access resources. Finally, my lecture will end with how I practice as a Death Doula from educational outreach through to legacy work.
The class will end with a question-and-answer discussion that is open to any of the topics covered or other thoughts that may come up. Participants will leave the lecture with an extended knowledge of modern death care, as well as workbooks and handouts of local and national resources.

Terminal Talk
2026-02-23 10:30 - 12:00 | Virtual Terminal Talk, CA, 92024, United States

February 2026 Solana Beach Death Cafe
2026-02-25 13:00 - 14:30 | Solana Beach, CA, CA, 92075, United States
Join us for the first Solana Beach Death Cafe of 2026 on Wednesday, February 25, from 1-2:30 PM. We serve a light lunch along with deep conversations regarding dying and death.
More About the Solana Beach Death Cafe
The Solana Beach Death Cafe is formerly known as the “North County Coastal San Diego (NCCSD).” This in-person Death Cafe celebrated its second anniversary in August 2025.
No matter what it is called, this Death Cafe is blessed to have many regular attendees who bring their curiosity and wisdom to the group. You will find us a most welcoming group who meets on the fourth Wednesday of every other month except December, to enjoy fellowship and an assortment of complimentary sandwiches and beverages. We also provide a fresh fruit and vegetable tray and a rotating dessert choice.
The private clubhouse that sponsors the Solana Beach Death Cafe boasts an ocean view and a variety of small-group seating options. There is plenty of free parking, too.
Do you have an interest in the subject of dying and death? Are you looking for a safe place to share your thoughts, ask questions, and hear what others say?
At this Death Cafe, we welcome all opinions and topics, provided they follow a few rules that keep the discussions safe and accessible. You are certainly welcome to join us for quality conversations around dying and death.
What is a Death Cafe?
The purpose of this Death Cafe is “ to increase awareness of death to help people make the most of their finite lives.” We use this time to discuss dying and death with no expectations, agendas, themes, or promotions.
Death Cafes are a worldwide phenomenon. Jon Underwood launched and hosted Death Cafes in London from 2011 until his death from cancer in 2017. He modeled them after Swiss sociologist Bernard Crettaz’s “Café Mortale.” In 2012, Lizzy Miles hosted the first Death Cafe in the US in Columbus, Ohio.
Death Cafes and DeathCafe.com are hosted by volunteers and are always FREE to attend. The guidelines that govern Death Cafes are the vision of Jon Underwood to keep the conversation welcoming and free from personal debate. Attending Death Cafes brings you into a space that allows for an exchange of ideas without the pressure of conforming.
Some Death Cafes ask for donations. Consequently, if you feel the need to donate, please donate directly to this Death Cafe, or directly to DeathCafe.com.
Learn more about the Death Cafes hosted by Mel here.

San Diego Virtual Death Cafe
2026-02-25 18:30 - 2026-02-26 20:00, 2026-03-25 18:30 - 20:00, 2026-04-22 18:30 - 20:00, 2026-05-27 18:30 - 20:00 | San Diego Virtual Death Cafe, CA, 92024, United States
The San Diego Virtual Death Cafe is a safe place to share your interest in the subject of dying and death. Are you looking for a safe place to share your thoughts, ask questions, and hear what others say? At this Death Cafe, we welcome all opinions and topics, provided they follow a few rules that keep the discussions safe and accessible.
The History of Death Cafes
Death Cafes are an international phenomenon. Jon Underwood founded Death Cafes in 2011 in London, England. Jon’s vision was to create a space where people could talk about death over tea and cake. The cafes welcome all perspectives. Jon knew that creating a space where people knew there was no agenda, no speakers, nor promotions created an environment that nurtured organic conversation.
After Jon died from cancer in 2017, his family and friends continued Death Cafe as a tribute to his life’s work. To this day, Death Cafes remain free to attend and free from pre-planned discussion. All Death Cafe hosts agree to host as volunteers and to follow the guidelines set by Jon.
The History of The San Diego Virtual Death Cafe
In March 2020, the state of California declared a state of emergency due to a novel human coronavirus that was highly infectious and deadly to vulnerable populations. People were required to avoid congregating in person. Schools, churches, libraries, and cafes were closed.
I received an email from Death Cafe hosts, Mits Tomita and Frank Stefano, asking if I wanted to be part of an online Death Cafe. I accepted the invitation, and we hosted our first San Diego Virtual Death Cafe in April of 2020. At first, it was difficult to navigate the technology required to host successfully. We had many hiccups and a “Zoom Bomb” or two that helped us learn how to be better hosts.
Eventually, Mits’ schedule could no longer accommodate the time and day that worked for our attendees. Frank and I continued to co-host on the fourth Wednesday of every month. In the end, Frank decided to hand me the reins, and I continue hosting to this day.

March Terminal Talk New Time
2026-03-11 11:30 - 13:00 | Virtual Terminal Talk, CA, 92024, United States
Do you have a life-limiting diagnosis? Virtual Terminal Talk is a FREE group-led discussion inviting people living with a life-limiting diagnosis to join others in exploring the realities of dying and death. This supportive space encourages participants to share thoughts on the physical, emotional, and spiritual aspects of dying. While grief may naturally emerge, Terminal Talk does not serve as a grief support group or cater to caregivers, loved ones, or the general public.
All diagnoses are welcome! Whether you’re living with ALS, cancer, heart failure, or something else, we want you to join our group. We are a friendly place and understand the loneliness that comes with trying to make sense of our fate.
The History of Terminal Talk
Terminal Talk’s host, Mel McClave, was invited by Roseana Spangler-Sims to host “Terminal Talk: An Open Discussion on Dying for a Select Few.” Roseana yearned for a place where people living with an incurable diagnosis could come together to talk about their experience. In May 2025, Mel hosted the first “Terminal Talk” in person at the Vista Senior Center.
Although people wanted a virtual option, Terminal Talk remained in-person until Roseana’s death in August 2025. Consequently, Mel pivoted the in-person meeting into a virtual meeting on the same date and time. Mel learned how to host a group like Terminal Talk through her volunteer work as a Death Cafe host.
The Future
Seven people joined the first meeting of the Virtual Terminal Talk. Considering the nature of this discussion group, it’s important to invite all who qualify to participate. The bond we form transcends the limits of geography and time.
In 2026, we expanded Terminal Talk to two meetings per month. We are blessed to spend 90 minutes together twice a month.
We need your support to help Terminal Talk continue to grow. Please share this free resource with anyone who qualifies or knows someone who qualifies. This is important as the founding members of the group succumb to their fate and are only present in spirit.
Join “Terminal Talk” – a free, confidential group for those living with a life-limiting diagnosis to openly discuss the physical, emotional, and spiritual aspects of dying.

Exclusively for patients – not caregivers, loved ones, or the general public.
Terminal Talk in 2026
We added a second “Terminal Talk” date and a new time! The original “Terminal Talk” date continues to be the second Wednesday of every month. We moved the time from 10:30 AM- Noon (Pacific Time) to 11:30 AM- 1 PM (Pacific Time) to accommodate more participants.
The second day for “Terminal Talk” will vary monthly depending on availability. Be sure, I will send out a Zoom link notification with the month’s dates to all who qualify.

CANP 48th Educational Conference in San Diego
2026-03-12 10:00 - 2026-03-14 17:00 | Manchester Grand Hyatt, 1 Market Pl, San Diego, CA, 92101, United States
What is the CANP?
Founded in 1977, the California Association of Nurse Practitioners (CANP) is a state-based organization that brings together more than 40,000 Nurse Practitioners (NPs) who work in California. The CANP is the only association dedicated to advocating for NPs as they expand their roles in modern healthcare.
What is a Nurse Practitioner (NP)?
NPs are Registered Nurses (RNs) with additional training and education who fill gaps in California’s healthcare system, where Medical Doctors (MDs) need extra support. You can find NPs in rural and urban settings. They are qualified to diagnose disease, prescribe medications, and sign legally-binding documents such as a POLST.
NPs and End-of-Life Planning
Your relationship with your NP includes planning for end-of-life situations. Find me volunteering at the Compassion & Choices booth on Thursday and Friday, March 12-13, 2026. I will be handing out information on Advance HealthCare Directives (AHD) and dementia addenda.
As a board member of the San Diego Coalition for Compassionate Care (SDCCC), I will have decision aids and POLSTS to share with NPs attending the CANP 48th Annual Education Conference.

Virtual Terminal Talk
2026-03-23 11:30 - 13:00 | Virtual Terminal Talk, CA, 92024, United States

O.C. Virtual Death Cafe
2026-04-07 16:30 - 18:00 | Orange County Virtual Death Cafe, United States
The O.C. Virtual Death Cafe is the place to be to immerse yourself in a lively discussion around dying and death. Anyone who is curious about dying and death is welcome.
Are you looking for a safe place to share your thoughts, ask questions, and hear what others say? At our long-running O.C. Virtual Death Cafe, we welcome all opinions and topics, provided the guidelines that keep the discussions safe and accessible are respected. Please RSVP to: melissa@lastactsoflove.com for the Zoom link or more information.
The History of the OC Virtual Death Cafe
Southern California resident and end-of-life doula Linda Barnard co-hosted the first Orange County Death Cafe in October 2021 with veteran San Diego Death Cafe host, Dr. Mitsuo “Mits” Tomita. What started as a mid-COVID monthly meetup has continued to flourish as a virtual monthly discussion. Linda continued to host the Orange County Death Cafe after Mits was unavailable to co-host monthly. Linda decided to step down as host in September 2024.
In October 2024, Linda asked San Diego Virtual Death Cafe host Melissa ‘Mel’ McClave to take over hosting duties of the Orange County Death Cafe. Mel made the Orange County Death Cafe a permanent virtual meeting and changed the name to OC Virtual Death Cafe.
Deathwork in Orange County California
For over 100 years, the residents of Orange County, California have thoughtfully cared for their dead. Orange County is home to about one million residents, all of whom will die. The ethnic diversity of the county requires a thoughtful approach to cultural rituals and modern legacy options.
Leisure World in Seal Beach and Laguna Hills are Orange County’s premiere retirement communties. Residents of Lesiure World buy into their community knowing that it will be their home at the end of life. Residents are serviced nearby mortuaries and cemeteries.
In May 2024, Barbara McMurray founded the Orange County Deathworkers Alliance to bring together traditional and new-age practicioners of end-of-life care providers. The alliance currently includes caregiver services, end-of-life doulas, physicians, memorial artists, and authors who write extensively on end of life topics.

What Gives Your Life Meaning?
2026-04-14 12:00 - 13:00 | CSUSM, 333 S. Twin Oaks Valley Road, San Marcos, CA, 92096, United States
What Gives Your Life Meaning? (WGYLM)

Advance Healthcare Discussion in Barrio Logan
2026-04-16 10:00 - 12:00 | Paradise Senior Center, 1880 Logan Ave, San Diego, CA, 92113, United States
FREE, dual-language workshop and discussion April 16th in San Diego

Solana Beach Death Cafe
2026-04-22 13:00 - 14:30 | Solana Beach, CA, CA, 92075, United States

Nathan Kottkamp Founder of National Healthcare Decisions Day- SDCCC April Speaker
2026-04-23 15:00 - 16:00 | San Diego Coalition for Compassionate Care, 900 Cantebury Place Room 300, Encinitas, CA, 920025, United States
SDCCC’s April Speaker is Nathan Kottkamp, Founder of National Healthcare Decisions Day
Join SDCCC on Thursday, April 23rd, at 3 PM for a very special speaker this month, Nathan Kottkamp, the founder of National Healthcare Decisions Day, April 16. This year celebrates twenty years since the movement was initiated and 18 years of national involvement.
What is SDCCC?
The San Diego Coalition for Compassionate Care (SDCCC) was founded in 2016 after obtaining a grant from the California Health Care Foundation (CHFD) to expand the mission of the Coalition for Compassionate Care of California (CCCC). The mission of the CCCC is to standardize the use and implementation of the Physicians Order for Life Sustaining Treatment (POLST)
What is National Healthcare Decisions Day?
National Healthcare Decisions Day (NHDD) was founded in 2008 by Virginia attorney Nathan Kottkamp. The goal of NHDD is to get every adult aged 18 to fill out an Advance Healthcare Directive. The idea came to Nate when he filled out his first Advance Healthcare Directive (AHD) at the age of twenty. In 2006, realizing that many of his peers and elders in the community were unaware of its importance, he started working with hospitals in his home state of Virginia, educating healthcare providers. The event was so successful that in 2008, he brought it to the national stage.
Today, we celebrate NHDD on April 16th to follow Tax Day on April 15th. After all, the two unavoidable life events are death and taxes. And we have to pay our taxes first.
What is an Advance Healthcare Directive?

An Advance Health Care Directive (AHD) is a written, signed, and witnessed document that outlines who will speak for you when you can’t speak for yourself. It details your wishes around certain life-sustaining treatments and organ donation options. There are a variety of AHD to choose from, including the State Probate form.
Unlike the POLST form, AHD doesn’t require a medical professional’s signature to be valid. It’s a document that can be revised at any time. I recommend using the Five D’s to determine if your AHD still meets your needs. The Five D’s are:

Death: Has your agent or alternative agent died?
Divorce: Is your ex-spouse your agent? Are you comfortable leaving them to speak for you when you’re unable to speak for yourself?
Diagnosis: Have you or your agent been diagnosed with a life-limiting diagnosis? Or a neurological disorder like dementia?
Distance: Have you or your agent moved out of state or country? If so, this is a good time to revisit your AHD agent and alternative agents.
December: It’s helpful to revisit your AHD each December to make sure it’s up-to-date with your values, medical advancements, and current lifestyle.

Ask An End-Of-Life Doula
2026-04-24 10:30 - 12:00 | Vista Senior Center, 1400 Vale Terrace, Vista, CA, 92084, United States
“Ask An End-Of-Life Doula” meets in person at the Vista Senior Center five times per year. End-of-Life Doulas Mel McClave and Eva Navarrete come together to answer your questions about what an end-of-life doula does, and how we help individuals navigate the topics of dying and death with their loved ones. Between us, we have decades of experience in teaching people how to broach the topic of mortality.
Eva and I started these dual language, English and Spanish, workshops for the 2024 World Design Capital‘s “Imagining a Better Death” initiative. Henceforth, our “Compassionate Conversations/ Conversaciones Compasivas” end-of-life workshops were so successful that we’ve incorporated them into our public outreach. Currently, we hold regularly scheduled end-of-life discussions at the Vista Senior Center and other international and domestic venues.
What Topics Do We Cover?
We cover topics ranging from Advance Healthcare Directive planning, how to safely use plant medicine, and what falls under the scope of practice as an end-of-life doula.
Come pick our brains to learn more about organ donation, different body disposition options, and legacy ideas. Depending on the size of the group, we will help attendees fill out their Advance Healthcare Directives and witness their signing of them.
What Is An End-of-Life Doula?
An end-of-life doula offers non-medical support. Although we are well-versed in medical treatments and their effects on individuals, we use our knowledge to help you navigate your relationship with your physician and medical team. Doulas offer you a range of end-of-life options, including full treatment through to body autonomy at the end of life. We believe that it is your right to know what your options are and make informed choices based on your circumstances and values. As end-of-life doulas, we support you and your loved ones by advocating for your choice.
Using a variety of resources, we discuss your end-of-life options to help you make the best choice for yourself and your family. Our sponsors include Compassion & Choices, the San Diego Coalition for Compassionate Care, and the Vista Senior Center.

"End-of-Life Reimagined: Exploring the Role of a Death Doula"
2026-05-04 13:00 - 14:30 | San Diego Oasis Rancho Bernardo, 17170 Bernardo Center Dr, San Diego, 92128, United States

Orange County Virtual Death Cafe
2026-05-05 16:30 - 18:00 | Orange County Virtual Death Cafe, United States
The Orange County Virtual Death Cafe is the place to be to immerse yourself in a lively discussion around dying and death. Anyone curious about dying and death is welcome.
Are you looking for a safe place to share your thoughts, ask questions, and hear what others say? At our long-running O.C. Virtual Death Cafe, we welcome all opinions and topics, provided the guidelines that keep the discussions safe and accessible are respected. Please RSVP to: melissa@lastactsoflove.com for the Zoom link or more information.
The History of the OC Virtual Death Cafe
Southern California resident and end-of-life doula Linda Barnard co-hosted the first Orange County Death Cafe in October 2021 with veteran San Diego Death Cafe host, Dr. Mitsuo “Mits” Tomita. What started as a mid-COVID monthly meetup has continued to flourish as a virtual monthly discussion. Linda continued to host the Orange County Death Cafe after Mits was unavailable to co-host monthly. Linda decided to step down as host in September 2024.
In October 2024, Linda asked San Diego Virtual Death Cafe host Melissa ‘Mel’ McClave to take over hosting duties of the Orange County Death Cafe. Mel made the Orange County Death Cafe a permanent virtual meeting and changed the name to OC Virtual Death Cafe.
Deathwork in Orange County, California
For over 100 years, the residents of Orange County, California, have thoughtfully cared for their dead. Orange County is home to about one million residents, all of whom will die. The ethnic diversity of the county requires a thoughtful approach to cultural rituals and modern legacy options.
Leisure World in Seal Beach and Laguna Hills are Orange County’s premier retirement communities. Residents of Leisure World buy into their community knowing that it will be their home at the end of life. Residents are serviced by nearby mortuaries and cemeteries.
In May 2024, Barbara McMurray founded the Orange County Deathworkers Alliance to bring together traditional and new-age practitioners of end-of-life care providers. The alliance currently includes caregiver services, end-of-life doulas, physicians, memorial artists, and authors who write extensively on end-of-life topics.
O.C. Virtual Death Cafe

Virtual Terminal Talk
2026-05-13 11:30 - 13:00 | Virtual Terminal Talk, CA, 92024, United States
Do you have a life-limiting diagnosis? Virtual Terminal Talk is a FREE group-led discussion inviting people living with a life-limiting diagnosis to join others in exploring the realities of dying and death. This supportive space encourages participants to share thoughts on the physical, emotional, and spiritual aspects of dying. While grief may naturally emerge, Terminal Talk does not serve as a grief support group or cater to caregivers, loved ones, or the general public.
All diagnoses are welcome! Whether you’re living with ALS, cancer, heart failure, or something else, we want you to join our group. We are a friendly place and understand the loneliness that comes with trying to make sense of our fate.
The History of Terminal Talk
Terminal Talk’s host, Mel McClave, was invited by Roseana Spangler-Sims to host “Terminal Talk: An Open Discussion on Dying for a Select Few.” Roseana yearned for a place where people living with an incurable diagnosis could come together to talk about their experience. In May 2025, Mel hosted the first “Terminal Talk” in person at the Vista Senior Center.
Although people wanted a virtual option, Terminal Talk remained in-person until Roseana’s death in August 2025. Consequently, Mel pivoted the in-person meeting into a virtual meeting on the same date and time. Mel learned how to host a group like Terminal Talk through her volunteer work as a Death Cafe host.
The Future
Seven people joined the first meeting of the Virtual Terminal Talk. Considering the nature of this discussion group, it’s important to invite all who qualify to participate. The bond we form transcends the limits of geography and time.
In 2026, we expanded Terminal Talk to two meetings per month. We are blessed to spend 90 minutes together twice a month.
We need your support to help Terminal Talk continue to grow. Please share this free resource with anyone who qualifies or knows someone who qualifies. This is important as the founding members succumb to their fate and are only present in spirit.
Join “Terminal Talk” – a free, confidential group for those living with a life-limiting diagnosis to openly discuss the physical, emotional, and spiritual aspects of dying.

Exclusively for patients – not caregivers, loved ones, or the general public.

Virtual Terminal Talk
2026-05-27 11:30 - 13:00 | Virtual Terminal Talk, CA, 92024, United States
Do you have a life-limiting diagnosis? Virtual Terminal Talk is a FREE group-led discussion inviting people living with a life-limiting diagnosis to join others in exploring the realities of dying and death. This supportive space encourages participants to share thoughts on the physical, emotional, and spiritual aspects of dying. While grief may naturally emerge, Terminal Talk is not a grief support group and does not cater to caregivers, loved ones, or the general public.
All diagnoses are welcome! Whether you’re living with ALS, cancer, heart failure, or something else, we want you to join our group. We are a friendly place and understand the loneliness that comes with trying to make sense of our fate.
The History of Terminal Talk
Terminal Talk’s host, Mel McClave, was invited by Roseana Spangler-Sims to host “Terminal Talk: An Open Discussion on Dying for a Select Few.” Roseana yearned for a place where people living with an incurable diagnosis could come together to talk about their experience. In May 2025, Mel hosted the first “Terminal Talk” in person at the Vista Senior Center.
Although people wanted a virtual option, Terminal Talk remained in-person until Roseana’s death in August 2025. Consequently, Mel pivoted the in-person meeting into a virtual meeting on the same date and time. Mel learned how to host a group like Terminal Talk through her volunteer work as a Death Cafe host.
The Future
Seven people joined the first meeting of the Virtual Terminal Talk. Considering the nature of this discussion group, it’s important to invite all who qualify to participate. The bond we form transcends the limits of geography and time.
In 2026, we expanded Terminal Talk to two meetings per month. We are blessed to spend 90 minutes together twice a month.
We need your support to help Terminal Talk continue to grow. Please share this free resource with anyone who qualifies or with anyone who knows someone who qualifies. This is important as the founding members succumb to their fate and are only present in spirit.
Join “Terminal Talk” – a free, confidential group for those living with a life-limiting diagnosis to openly discuss the physical, emotional, and spiritual aspects of dying.

Exclusively for patients – not caregivers, loved ones, or the general public.

San Diego Senior Expo
2026-05-28 10:00 - 13:00 | Vesper Venue at Liberty Station, 2875 Dewey RD, San Diego, CA, 92106, United States

SDCCC's May Speaker Meeting
2026-05-28 15:00 - 16:00 | San Diego Coalition for Compassionate Care, 900 Cantebury Place Room 300, Encinitas, CA, 920025, United States

2026 UCSD Body Donation Memorial Service
2026-05-31 18:00 - 20:00 | Epstein Family Amphitheater, 9500 Gilman Dr, San Diego, CA, 92093, United States
2026 UCSD Body Donation Memorial Service
The 2026 UCSD Body Donation Memorial Service is open to the family and friends of loved ones who donated their bodies to science. Join the faculty and students from the 2025/2026 UCSD School of Medicine and the Skaggs School of Pharmacy in honoring the gift from your loved one who selflessly donated their body. Their gift will further advance medicine for generations to come.
2026 UCSD Whole Body Donation Memorial Service Details
The service on Sunday, May 31st, starts at 6 PM with doors opening at 5 PM. The venue is the Epstein Family Amphitheater on the University of California, San Diego campus. This recent addition to the campus is a beautiful open-air theater with plenty of seating. The program invites friends and family to attend the free event. Parking is available at the Gilman Parking Structure. Transportation from the garage to the venue is available. The program is providing light refreshment.s
History of the UCSD Whole Body Donation Program
UCSD School of Medicine was founded in 1966. In 1968, the first cohort of students entered the program in 1968 with the first whole body donations. In the five decades since, the program has grown to accept the bodies of donors who believe in forwarding education and research in anatomy.
Benefits of the UCSD Whole Body Donation Program
Being a whole body donor requires a conversation with yourself, your loved ones, and the program. Additionally, body donors benefit from knowing that they are contributing to the betterment of mankind. Many donors die without anyone to receive their remains or tend a grave. Some donors find relief knowing that their body disposition choice is free of charge. Finally, knowing that their remains will find their final resting spot in the Pacific Ocean is also a motivation to sign the donor papers.
My Connection to the UCSD Whole Body Donation Program
I have many personal connections with the UCSD Whole Body Donation Program. I am a registered whole body donor. After many conversations with my husband and kids, I felt comfortable in signing and submitting my donor application.
On September 1, 2025, my client Roseana Spangler-Sims’ body was picked up by the program representatives after she exercised her right to body autonomy through Medical Aid in Dying, surrounded by her loved ones. Roseana’s journey is featured in this People.com series. Her impact on my life continues through my “Terminal Talk” support group for people living with a life-limiting diagnosis.

Vista Senior Center's "Empowered Aging" Series
2026-06-01 13:00 - 14:00 | Vista Senior Center, 1400 Vale Terrace, Vista, CA, 92084, United States

OC Virtual Death Cafe
2026-06-02 16:30 - 18:00 | Orange County Virtual Death Cafe, United States
The Orange County Virtual Death Cafe is the place to be to immerse yourself in a lively discussion around dying and death. Anyone curious about dying and death is welcome.
Are you looking for a safe place to share your thoughts, ask questions, and hear what others say? At our long-running O.C. Virtual Death Cafe, we welcome all opinions and topics, provided the guidelines that keep the discussions safe and accessible are respected. Please RSVP to: melissa@lastactsoflove.com for the Zoom link or more information.
The History of the OC Virtual Death Cafe
Southern California resident and end-of-life doula Linda Barnard co-hosted the first Orange County Death Cafe in October 2021 with veteran San Diego Death Cafe host, Dr. Mitsuo “Mits” Tomita. What started as a mid-COVID monthly meetup has continued to flourish as a virtual monthly discussion. Linda continued to host the Orange County Death Cafe after Mits was unavailable to co-host monthly. Linda decided to step down as host in September 2024.
In October 2024, Linda asked San Diego Virtual Death Cafe host Melissa ‘Mel’ McClave to take over hosting duties of the Orange County Death Cafe. Mel made the Orange County Death Cafe a permanent virtual meeting and changed the name to OC Virtual Death Cafe.
Deathwork in Orange County, California
For over 100 years, the residents of Orange County, California, have thoughtfully cared for their dead. Orange County is home to about one million residents, all of whom will die. The ethnic diversity of the county requires a thoughtful approach to cultural rituals and modern legacy options.
Leisure World in Seal Beach and Laguna Hills are Orange County’s premier retirement communities. Residents of Leisure World buy into their community knowing that it will be their home at the end of life. Residents are serviced by nearby mortuaries and cemeteries.
In May 2024, Barbara McMurray founded the Orange County Deathworkers Alliance to bring together traditional and new-age practitioners of end-of-life care providers. The alliance currently includes caregiver services, end-of-life doulas, physicians, memorial artists, and authors who write extensively on end-of-life topics.

Vista Death Cafe
2026-06-03 13:00 - 14:00 | Vista Senior Center, 1400 Vale Terrace, Vista, CA, 92084, United States
The Vista Death Cafe meets in person at 1 PM once per quarter. The Vista Death Cafe started in August 2025. Despite having to coordinate schedules with the very active Vista senior community, Mel McClave eventually found a time and space that fit into both schedules.
Do you have an interest in the subject of dying and death? Are you looking for a safe space to share your thoughts, ask questions, and hear what others say? At this Death Cafe, we welcome all opinions and topics, provided they follow a few rules that keep the discussions safe and accessible. You are certainly welcome to join us for quality conversations around dying and death.
The purpose of this Death Cafe is “ to increase awareness of death to help people make the most of their finite lives.” We use this time to discuss dying and death with no expectations, agendas, themes, or promotions.
Death Cafes are a worldwide phenomenon. Jon Underwood launched and hosted Death Cafes in London from 2011 until his death from cancer in 2017. He modeled them after Swiss sociologist Bernard Crettaz’s “Café Mortale.” In 2012, Lizzy Miles hosted the first Death Cafe in the US in Columbus, Ohio.
Volunteers host Death Cafes and DeathCafe.com, and they are always FREE to attend. The guidelines that govern Death Cafes are the vision of Jon Underwood to keep the conversation welcoming and free from personal debate. Attending Death Cafes allows you to enter a space created for exchanging ideas without the pressure of conforming. Some Death Cafes ask for donations. Consequently, if you feel the need to donate, please donate directly to this Death Cafe or directly to DeathCafe.com.
Learn more about Mel’s five years of experience as a Death Cafe host and the Death Cafes she hosts, here.
